To live in a big and beautiful house with a person you love. You have been building it for years now, decorate it with nice furniture, accessories, every time you add some nice fresh flowers into your vases that send beautiful essence into the rooms. You water your plants on the balcony and all over your big garden. You care for it and cherish it. You have your babies as a product of your love and dream. There is so much love everywhere….
At first, you both equally share duties, then slowly slowly you notice it is mainly you by yourself that cleans up and takes care of others and things. You start not to be able to keep it with its maintenance anymore, as you are taking care of other members that live in the house as well. You start getting tired and upset that you are losing control as things to repair and fix are piling up. It is hard for you to see it now in such poor shape, but you are alone.
And then one day, an earthquake. Massive one. Your house is destroyed. At first, you don’t realise the full extent of a damage but you know it’s serious. You don’t even wanna accept it might be it for your beautiful home and dream… you still want to believe it’s repairable, that it can be rebuilt, it can be saved as long as the main construction has been spared. You are in shock. You stopped worried about your pretty accessories or flowers, they can be replaced. The rest of the family members are alive. Under the same shock as you, maybe more, hurt, very hurt, but alive. That’s important. Still breathing, just like you, only about, though.
But soon you notice huge cracks in the foundation. The static is unfit. It won’t hold the house anymore even if we tried. At this point, you are coming to terms with the fact you need to pull whatever’s left of it down. No matter what you do, it’s unsafe to stay in such “house”. It would not stand to even another little shake, let alone another earthquake.
Nothing you can do. You have to take probably the hardest but the smartest decision of your life and pull the house down completely. Even if you cry your eyes out, nothing can be done to save it and spare all of you from such heartache. You watch it with disbelief as something stronger than yourself made such huge damage to your dream and you couldn’t stop it or prevent it, or could you?
You ask yourself so many questions… why did we decide to live here, why didn’t we think of possible earthquakes and built maybe anti-seismic foundations, why didn’t we reinforce the walls.. why, why… why did I listen to you when I told you I have a feeling this place is too pretty and seductive, it must have some dangers to watch out for and you answered: don’t worry, you are being only paranoid. Everything is just fine. Hmmm
Too late to ask yourself any questions or even look for someone to hold responsible. Far too late. The “house”, the dream is gone.
Accept it. What else can you do? You start again. You will build your new house. One day when you recover and get stronger. You’ll have your new beautiful home to love and bring love, to grow love, to multiply love, to take care of your loved ones in your house, simply to call it your DREAM again.
But, will it be in the same place? Will it have the same shape? Shall we use the same materials? Same accessories? Will it be the same?
Because you have learned. You are not going to watch another dream of yours perish in an “earthquake”. You will not allow it. You cannot go through the same pain again.
This time the foundation must be much much stronger. Anti-seismic. Or you choose altogether a different place to build your house in. It might have the same shape, but the materials you use this time will be much lighter, more modern, adapted and sophisticated. You loved the character and style of the “old” house, so you might keep it the same, or maybe you’ll go for a change and choose something totally different, or maybe on purpose, so it doesn’t remind you of the old one or vice versa, so it does. However, you’ll be more careful and thoughtful with your choices as you have burnt and learnt.
Or you just go with your gut feeling. You’ll follow your heart and not worry too much about it and say: we live once only, I might just as well follow my heart and live right here right now.
You try. At least you give it the best chance, the best shot, you give it all you have. Not that you didn’t do it the first time round… at least you thought you did, but this time you make a helluva sure.
You’ll make sure… as you decided to keep on DREAMING and you know that dreams do come true. The dreams are something nobody can take it away from you. They are free of charge.
You will fall in love again, you will love again and be loved again, you will create a beautiful relationship with strong foundations, you are strong to build your new dream “home after an earthquake”.
Something I still profoundly believe in. Yes, I was heartbroken after my “home” and foundations were terribly shaken to the ground. But I don’t lose my FAITH. My babies keep reminding me of my importance, that I still have them to stay strong for and have a lot to live for. I started mastering my mind that helps me to concentrate on my future rather than dwell on my past. That even if you lose someone you loved, you can still carry on alone and be ok. Only after staying alone I had the courage to see myself as I really am. I stopped building alibis with which to explain the failure and rather started acquiring new habits with which to create my future in freedom, love and peace. And I am grateful for all the lessons as they made me ME, the stronger and better version.
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